Are you ready to ramble?!

Have you ever sat down to blog and found yourself reading everyone else's blogs and never getting around to posting your own? Happens to me on almost a daily basis.

When we moved here, I consciously gave myself six months to get settled, get involved, start making friends, etc. Well, my six months were up in February, and I was still feeling lonely and isolated. I figured that had to be at least partially my fault, so I started taking some extra steps--inviting people over for dinner, applying for the public library board, organizing a playgroup, etc. And now all of a sudden it seems like life is busy again. (Not that I was ever bored--there are always chores to do.) The playgroup is happening one morning a week (although the weather hasn't been cooperative so we haven't had great participation). I was selected to be on the library board and attended my first board meeting this month. I was released as a Primary teacher and called as the Primary secretary and as a Cub Scout Wolf Den Leader with Jeff. Adam's baseball season started--two practices or games each week. (Ahh, you probably didn't even realize you were missing out on baseball posts, did you? :-) Being busy and involved is good for me. I'm getting to know people and I don't have much time to mope around (or to blog). But I have to admit, there have been moments lately when I've missed those empty days on the calendar.

Mother's Day came and went. I had a good one. Jeff and the boys gave me a bicycle trailer and five bars of German chocolate. Adam and Ryan also gave me the requisite homemade gifts they made at school--poems, cards, coupon books--good stuff. Jeff made a yummy dinner and Adam and Ryan helped him clean up. I played games with the kids and did some thinking about how grateful I am to be a mom and how grateful I am for the moms in my life--my mother and my mother-in-law in particular. Motherhood has been on my mind lately anyway. The other day it occurred to me that I do so much for my kids that no else would ever do. And it's not so important what those things are as it is that they have someone who loves them that much. I am not a perfect mother, but I do love my boys and I consider it a privilege to be able to use my time and energy to take care of them. I pray every day for help to be a better mother and to raise them well.

When I thought of how much I do for my kids, that led to new thoughts and realizations about how much my mother has done for me. Having kids has helped me better understand the love and sacrifice she gave me and my brothers and sisters. Adam is in his first baseball league where the kids pitch to each other. He hasn't pitched in a game yet, but I don't know how I'll handle it if he does. It is painful to watch the pitchers try their hardest just to get the ball across the plate. Sometimes they succeed, but most of the time they don't. My emotions fluctuate with every pitch, good and bad. And they aren't even my kid! My mom was the pitcher's mom for two of the seasons I played Little League. In some ways I'm sorry I put her through that. I don't know how she did it.

In other news, Dallin turned 18 months old this week. Sometimes I find myself wishing my life away. For the most part I think that is a bad habit and a foolish (albeit easy) thing to do. However, I think it is perfectly acceptable to count down and wish away the months and days until a toddler gets to go to nursery for two of the three hours of church every Sunday. Nursery makes moms and dads and toddlers so much happier on the Sabbath. Well, my toddlers at least. I know some have separation anxiety and don't do so well in nursery. I count it as a huge blessing that I am four for four on having my kids easily and happily go to nursery. Yay!

School is out in two weeks. That means I have two weeks to find a way to keep everyone from driving each other crazy all summer. I have these grand ideas of a Summer Plan, with a capital "P," that involves reading, practicing math and spelling, chores, setting and reaching goals, minimal TV, fun family activities, spending time together in the great outdoors, etc., etc. The motto of this wonderful plan will be: "Work hard, play hard." In that order. I am, however, trying to be realistic about my chances of getting anyone else to actually buy into my Summer Plan. I'm am fairly certain that I am going to have to settle for a summer plan, with a small "p." And I have two weeks to figure it out. Wish me luck. :-)